Understanding Tantrums Vs Meltdowns.......What Is The Difference?

 

When it comes to understanding the behaviors of autistic children, distinguishing between tantrum and meltdowns is crucial for parents, caregivers, and educators. Both responses can be challenging to manage, but they stem from different causes and require different approaches. In this blog post, we will explore the characteristics of tantrums and meltdowns and provide strategies for managing these behaviors. 

Let's start by talking about tantrums, typically a behavioral response. This occurs when a child is trying to get what they want or express frustration. In autistic children tantrum can be used to gain attention, gain an item or for a specific outcome. Children may engage in a tantrum to influence their surroundings or the people in them. They may also use tantrums as a way to express their frustration, often when they feel they are not heard. Signs of a tantrum could be crying, yelling, shouting, stomping or throwing items. The time frame for a tantrum is short and can be calmed with redirection or given them what they want.

On the other hand, a meltdown is an overwhelming response to stress or has had a sensory overload. Meltdowns are not intentional and often happens when a child feels they can no longer cope with their environment. Autistic children may experience sensitivities to sounds, lights, or textures which leads to a meltdown. When our children struggle to express their feelings or needs, it can result in a meltdown. Prolonged exposure to stressor can build up, leading to a point where the child can no longer manage their emotions. Signs to look for of a meltdown are loss of control over emotions and behavior, hitting kicking or collapsing (dropping to the ground). The length of time of a meltdown is longer and your child may need time to recover afterwards, depending on how intense they become. 

Now let's breakdown the difference between the two behaviors. Tantrums are often goal driven, while meltdowns are reactions to overwhelming situations. Tantrums typically last a shorter time and can often be redirected. Meltdowns on the other hand, can last longer and may require support to calm down. You may see after a tantrum that a child may feel satisfied if they get what they want, yet after a meltdown a child may feel exhausted or distressed.

Understanding what causes tantrums or meltdowns for your child can help in managing their behavior. Keeping track of these behaviors to survey patterns is also an option. Parents we have to identify the triggers for these behaviors in order to help manage them. Reducing sensory overload by creating a calm quiet space, where your child can go when feeling overwhelmed. Teaching our children coping skills helps them develop strategies to manage their emotions, such as breathing exercise, fidget toys, or taking breaks often work as well. Visual aids or communication devices help your child express their needs and feelings more effectively. It's crucial to maintain your composure during a tantrum or a meltdown. You being calm gives your child reassurance and makes it easier to de-escalate the situation. 

Recognizing the underlying causes of these behaviors allows parents and caregivers to respond appropriately, fostering a more supportive environment for growth and emotional regulation. 

Please feel free to comment your thoughts or experiences!

Navigating the Storm: Parents' Emotions After Their Child’s Medical Diagnosis

Receiving a medical diagnosis for a child is a life-altering event that evokes a whirlwind of emotions in parents. This experience often feels overwhelming, filled with uncertainty and fear alongside hope and love.

Initially, many parents feel shock, as the news can seem surreal. Denial may follow, with some believing the diagnosis is incorrect, serving as a protective mechanism to process the information.

As reality sets in, fear and anxiety emerge. Parents worry about their child’s future, potential treatments, and the diagnosis's impact on daily life. Questions like "Will my child be okay?" often plague their thoughts.

Feelings of guilt and self-blame are common as parents may question their role in the diagnosis. It’s important to recognize these feelings as natural, not reflective of actual responsibility.

Parents may feel profound sadness as they mourn the loss of the life they envisioned for their child, grieving for both health and affected experiences.

Anger can arise towards the situation or themselves, leading to frustration over a lack of understanding or resources. Constructively expressing these feelings is crucial.

Amidst the chaos, many parents find hope in their love for their child. Seeking stories of others who faced similar challenges can foster resilience.

Navigating emotions after a diagnosis doesn’t have to be done alone. Seeking support from family, friends, and professional counseling can provide essential outlets. Support groups can also connect parents with others who understand their journey.

The journey following a child's diagnosis is emotionally challenging. Parents will experience various feelings, and acknowledging these emotions is vital. By seeking support, they can navigate this difficult time, focusing on their child’s well-being and happiness. Remember, it’s okay to feel overwhelmed; you are not alone.

Parenthood & A Diagnosis

As a parent what was your reaction to your child's diagnosis? What signs did you see that prompted you to inquire about testing for your Ausome child? I am a mother of a child who has been diagnosed with Autism and ADHD. As my Ausome child started her milestones as a infant I noticed that she was a little off task. My daughter was not doing the babbling as children do around the ages of four to six months, it was more of a grunting and a lot of whining. What actually made me realized that my child may need to be evaluated was the fact that she was not crawling until she was almost one years old. She was given plenty of floor play and walker time but still didn't build up her strength for her to be mobile at that time. Due to my daughter being in daycare she was referred to Early Intervention, which was a huge blessing. Early Intervention in the state of New Jersey is a program designed to assist children from birth to the age of three years old who have missed milestones or have a known or unknown diagnosis. Early Intervention also provides a number of services for children which include Speech, Occupational Therapy and Physical Therapy. Through those services   we were able to address the issues that my daughter was facing and they gave us activities and exercises to complete on a daily basis to build up her strength in her core muscles so that she was able to sit up on her own without wobbling back and forth . After going through the services for about a year and a half my child was crawling and climbing full force. By the time my Ausome girl was two years old she began walking but she was walking on her toes. Toe walking is normal for some of those with Autism and can be helped by using MAFO braces to help with balance and walking. 

The early stages of knowing that my child was "different" per say was not a easy trial to go through in life, especially alone as a single parent. Sitting in that office as a doctor is explaining to me that my daughter would be non verbal, toe walker and mentally her brain functioned on a infant level at her age of three years old at that time. I honestly felt as if someone just pulled a chair from out under me. I seemed like my world crashed and shattered. A diagnosis does not just affect our children they affect us parents as well. As a parent your first thoughts of questions are what did I do wrong during my pregnancy, what could have I have done differently or how could I have prevented this from happening. Let me say this first, MOTHER'S IT WAS NOT YOU! We tend to be so hard on ourselves but once we begin our research and understand the process on our children's disabilities it becomes easier trust me. As parents we are our children's first line of advocacy so its so important to educate ourselves first to ensure we are not just accepting any treatment or medications that are children do not always necessarily need. Parents always remember to not let these diagnosis define who are children are. There are various treatment plans, medications and so on to aide us in this new age so never give up hope of what could change in your children's circumstances. God always has the final say on the things in this life. 

Now when we are talking resources, this is where my resource center Ka'Leah's Ausome Corner comes into play. Me as a parent, yet also a single parent knows the struggle through these processes first hand, not just on the level of Autism but my oldest son who is now nineteen years old was diagnosed with Cerebral Palsy at the tender age of eight months. My knowledge on the disabled population is broad in range and that is were my passion stems from when I decided to bring in to fruition my idea of a resource center. I want to be able to assist the ones in my community and surroundings with the knowledge that I did not have as a first time parent and a first time parent dealing with a child with a disability. This journey that we are going on with our children is a learning experience for us all across the board. I want to invent a safe space for us parents to have session to discuss the different diagnosis, to discuss how we feel as parents as we see our children progress/decline, behaviors and all. Parents do not always get that outlet that is needed to be there for their children eighty percent of the time and I want to create that twenty percent for them. I want our center to have open sensory play for children and eventually moving to have respite care available. Respite care takes the center to another level due to the high demand for respite care for young children in the area.